Obsession in cleanness

It's 1:26 am now, and I just finish doing laundry on the clothing (jeans and such) I brought early today. Yes, I have to make absolutely sure that the clothing I brought are absolutely clean whenever I feel like it's time to wear them.

Tempon and pantyhose

I have an extremely busy lifestyle, and as such I don't have much time to shop around. That's why if I find something that work for me, I will continue buying that same product again and again.

For instance, I brought a bag of Target branded Maxi overnight absorbency tempon (28 piece, pink in package) which is supposed to be the same as Always' Unscented with wings and sensadry. The 28 Overnight wrapped pads has a huge coverage surface area and worked great for me so far. So I think I will buy it again next time when I go to Target.

I also plan on getting another box of 2 pair Leggs' Sheer Energy B Suntan pantyhose. I like the Sheer Panty Sheer Toe model because it worked great with my qipaos, and my imperfect legs need something to cover up a bit.

My first major shopping for causal clothing

Up until now, I haven't been buying any female clothing for daily wearing. All of the dresses are either dance costume, cosplay costume or race queen costume. Yes, they are all costumes. But now I get to a point that I need to attend some social gathering that prompt me to the need of getting some regular daily clothing, at least a nice tank and a pair of jeans. And that's exactly what I did today.

I brought a pull-over sweater and pull-over from Belk today. Both were in Medium size. And then I got 2 pairs of jeans as I decided that I need one for wearing boots and one for wearing regular heel. I tried Lee Platinum premium fit collection 6 M bootcut stretch and it fit me well. So I brought it. Before that I tried 6 S but it's a bit too short for my taste. I also tried 8 Medium and it's a bit too large and baggy. I also brought a pair of Levis 6 Medium Perfect Waist Straight 525 jean.

So I finally have something to wear at next gathering. Yeah.

兔女郎裝

今個週末做了很多東西，其中最要的就是試用新買回來的衣車，和繼續用新買回來的化妝鏡練習化妝。又發覺兩年前買來的兔女郎裝好像沒有穿過，想看看自己胖了多少，結果，便攪出了這副德相。

Finally cut my fingernails

After leaving them long for almost one month, I finally cut the fingernails. It's so much comfortable to type without fingernails, but I missed the feminine sensation. Oh well, you can't have everything.

Getting better on polishing nails

I polished my nails today in cherry pink, and found myself done a pretty nice job. I partly credit my success to some blogs that I read about polishing nails. The tricks I used were:

• Make sure brush applied strokes in parallel to the nail and not dip down perpendicularly
• Start a stroke in middle an then each at the side.
• Always apply at least 2 layers on each nails
• Use cotton sticks to rub off excessive paint

After wearing the nail polish for a day, I now totally understand why applying the clear polish layer at the very last, which I did not do, is so important. I will definitely do that the next time. Nevertheless, I think I did a nice job today, and I am looking forward to try it again somtime later.

Sewing, Gluing and mending

It's post-Thanksgiving day, a day that I can relax and do stuff that I find important but not particularly urgent. So I took the opportunity to fix some of my costumes. In there are way more items that I found needed to fix than I expected. So I just keep sewing, gluing and mending those broken costumes. I don't thing I have everything needed to fix fixed, but I did enough to make me feel good about myself.

Dos and don't in social life

I came over this article called How to Find a Girl Who Likes Crossdressers (for Young Men) and found it very interesting. I am not actively looking for a partner, but then I am interest in being someone who's attractive and nice to be with, so it's always helpful to learn more about dos and don't in social life.

Goodbye, my long finger nails

I wan't intentionally do that all, but I stopped cutting my fingernails since weeks ago. Usually I will trim my finger nail constantly, almost to an obsessive level, but somehow I was so busy and so sick because of my flu that I just let the fingernail continue growing. Now they are long and kind of feminine. I even spent sometime yesterday trying to learn how to take off contact lens with long fingernails, and success.

However, I finally decide to cut my finger nails after reading this. I know that as a cross-dresser I am already not failing into the norm, and shouldn't care much about what mainstream thinks. Yet I don't want to give an impression that I am creepy or unhealthy or a drug taker. So after I did some nail polish exercise, I will cut all the finger nails short.

只此一張

上個週末，我到Dallas探朋友，為了準備那天晩上 去Party, 我們在酒店開了個房間，方便化妝和換衣服。當我試了一套紅色的賽車女郎裝，朋友說超好看，而且一定要我到酒店的健身泳池旁邊拍照，我只好照著做。但那天天 氣實在太冷。我擺了一會甫士，已經冷得要死。朋友最後也放過我。拍了十多張照片，結果只有這一張可以見人，其他的都是我一臉「待會我會用電鋸斬死妳全家」 的樣子。

Another lesson learned: don't wear adhesive bra for too long

Here's another thing that I learned last weekend during the parties at Dallas: DO NOT wear adhesive bar for too long. Specifically, don't wear it OVERNIGHT. I learned it the hard way as I found that there are some serious red mark on my chest created by the sticky part of the adhesive bar. This actually make sense because the sticky part that attached to my chest was the part that constantly supporting the weight of the whole silicon gel body. It's like constantly pulling your skin, and eventually it will create a red mark.

In fact, I think there was actually caution statement printed on the package of the adhesive bra. I saw it, didn't quite understand the reason, and eventually ignored it. Well, at least I know it now.

Camera, you don't lie

As crude as it is, I still like how camera shatter my illusions on how good/bad I look in costume. Sometime I tried a costume, and I thought the pose and look seemed nice, but once I looked at the photos I took, they bluntly told me that the costume looked horrible. Reality check is hard, but better than humiliating myself in public because of the wrong costume and hairstyle decision you made based on my own illusion.

Seriously, NO MORE long hair wig for me

After seeing the horrible photos of me during last weekend wearing a long hair wig at party, I promise myself NEVER EVER will I wear long hair wig UNLESS it's for photo shooting, and that I can take off the wig right after the photo shot. Like my friend Teresa said, my face look crazy long with long hair. Really not good.

鬚根的特別處理

上次拍婚紗照，化妝的時候，化妝師問我為何沒有明顯的鬚根，好像沒有鬚似的。

當然，我有鬍鬚，只是跟其他人相比，比較稀疏，但如果我不特別處理，化起女妝時，也會有很難處理的煩惱。所以每逢是重要日子的前夕， 例如拍私影，出動漫節，出席派對等場合，我也會對鬍鬚進行特別處理。

其實所謂特別處理，只是刻意不剃鬚，留待重要日子前的一晚，便用拔眉毛用的夾，將鬍鬚一條一條的拔出來。記得最初做的時候，花了我個 多小時，而且每拔一條鬚也痛得要命，但過了那麼多年，現在也沒有甚麼感覺了。經過這樣的處理後，我可以享受到有一個星期的時間，面上 沒有鬍鬚的感覺。當然，鬍鬚還是會長回來，過程便這樣循環下去 。

由於我通常只有在某些日子才女性化，喜歡經常女性化的妳可能覺得我的方法行不通。那麼，妳可能要用化妝品幫忙。我的經驗是，MAC的 NC20 Full Coverage 和NW25 Studio 的遮蓋鬚根能力超好（當然要找配合妳的膚色的型號）。

另外，我的發覺我的鬚越剃，鬚像越粗。所以有時我甚至會在上女妝前兩星期，密密剃鬚，那麼在拔鬚的時候，因為鬚粗了，拔起來也方便 點。

朋友問，這樣拔，毛孔不是會變大嗎？這個嘛，我倒沒發現這個情況，或者是我粗支大葉的沒有理吧。

美麗，但很辛苦

昨天到影樓拍了一輯婚紗和晩裝照。整個過程歷時四個半小時，當中大部份時間花在化妝上。花了千四港元，價錢蠻合理，不過原來 要等一個 月才可以收到相片，那時我也不在香港了，要過一兩年再回港才看到結果。

其實當初決定去拍攝婚紗照，收到一輯漂亮的相片還是次要，最重要的是看看如果自己化了一個新娘妝，會不會好看。因為新娘妝應一個人最 漂亮的妝容。如果化了新娘妝後仍然不好看，那就不再扮裝也罷。我也想將這個新娘妝當作自己化妝的目標，有目標，才有前進的動力嘛。

今次拍攝學到了和領會了不少東西。
- 我的短髮look比長髮look好看不多，如果不是為了cosplay角式需要，也不會不買短假髮了。
- 原來我有幾個角度超漂亮，包括側面，七分面（多得我的高鼻子）和昂首；有些角度則超醜，包括低首和close up。
- 原來我的笑容相當不好看，反而含蓄地微笑，有一種神秘美。
- 我的上唇偏薄，上唇膏可以搽厚一點。
- 我一直用的脫鬚方法原來相當成功，繼續。
- 應該開始減少穿露肩膀的服裝，畢竟那男兒肩膀破壞了女兒妝容的幻象。
- 我應該買個girdle.
- 先選服裝，後選飾物。
- 原來民族味的手鐲，介指和頸鏈相當容易襯晚裝，可以多買。
- 貼fake eyelash 要由中間貼起，不要貼到接近鼻那邊。要先畫好eyeliner 後才䀡。
- 我要多練習用新式油性 eyeliner pen 畫eyeline, 不要不用鉛筆型的了。
- 我的面尖，落胭脂不要向側上方掃。圓圓的點紅便好了。
- 拔眉毛要拔下面的毛，不要拔上面的，現在弄得自己一字眉了。
- 保養皮膚最重要，不過的甚麼也需要做，就是多多睡。
- 髮型原來比妝更重要。
- 我的白皮膚配粉紅服裝很好看。

學了那麼多東西算值回票價吧。

One major advantage of baby sitting a booth for my friend

A teenage girl walked by and sat down next to me. She was the one who walked by the booth I baby sat at on Friday while I was convincing her friend to try out the maid contest. She told me that she hurt her ankle, and the showed me the wrap medical people did to her. I salute the medical people who stay up at night in order to treat all the crazy teenagers who hurt themselves for all sort of stupid reasons.

It was a short chat, but I enjoyed the human contact. Baby sitting a booth is so far the best way to meet new people as far as I tell, especially for me kind who rarely proactively talk to other people. When you are baby sitting a booth, you got a reason to lure people ton have conversation with you, and in a lot of cases, people came to talk to you instead.

Bubble

My friend said I am always living in a bubble, finding happiness in my own little world. While I admin that I indeed enjoying things in my own way, I also think that every single one of us are living in a bubble too. It's just that mostly of you guys live in the kind of bubble that shapes like the bubble you've seen from other people, while I tried to craft my bubble in my own way, and so far being successful. And for that, I have no regret ..... Well .... No regret so far.

Painting fingernail: still suck at it

Yesterday I suddenly had the mood to try painting my fingernails. I rarely do it because I suck at it, but of course you can argue that I suck it because I rarely do it. Anyway, I found that 5 out of 10 nails were done pretty ok, which is higher the success rate compare with the last time I did.

Let's see when I have mood to do it again.

Probably won't last for a few times

I really like the race queen costume I wore at anime matsuri yesterday. Sadly I found out that around the edge of the collar, some of the pattern already started fading. And that's when I realized that it was ruined by my sweat, which is something I cannot avoid since the whole purpose of getting this costume is to wear it.

Still, I think that's ok. After all, i did not pay a lot for this costume. So I think this costume is meant to be wear only a few times, and then put it in the storage as a memory.

By the way, I need to establish a system to separate clean (washed) costume and costume worn a few times, so that I know when to clean what costume.